Chapter 204
Blood was everywhere.
It stained the ground and walls. Pieces of what used to be people were scattered all around. Some were still barely alive, curled up in pain. The floor was full of red pools, thick and wet, flowing like a stream, mixing with pieces of broken bodies. All the food and gifts we had prepared were now crushed, spilled, and stained. It was all ruined.
And I stood in the middle of it, holding a spear.
"Ah... ahhh... ah...!!"
The sound that came from me wasn't a cry, or a moan, or a cheer. It was a strange mix of feelings—sadness, anger, fear, and more—all twisted together and spilled from my mouth. It made sense, though. Anyone in my place would feel the same.
'...!?'
Then I saw myself. In the blood on the floor, I saw my own reflection.
But it wasn't fully me. Part of me still looked human. But the rest... no. It was something else. A monster eating away the human part. Half my face looked like it was crying. The other half was smiling in a broken, creepy way. And there was blood. So much blood.
'Aaa... Aaaahhh!!!'
I screamed again. And now I knew for sure. I was the one who had done this. I was the one who had caused this nightmare.
Why? How? This wasn't what I wanted. No way... this wasn't right!
'I messed up again... again...!!!!'
The words came out like black smoke. Like a curse. I kept talking, trying to explain, but it didn't matter. The truth stayed the same. I broke the trust they gave me. I lied. I bragged without proof. And this... this was the result.
It was over. Worse than before. I had fallen further behind with the path that was longer now. More tougher.
"Master..."
'...!?'
A quiet voice shook me out of it. I turned fast. My tail swung out and hit a few bodies, but I didn't care.
There, I saw them. Three people were standing at the door, making me unable to think. My mind stopped.
'You...!!'
My brain, even while falling apart, pulled out old memories. I remembered. I had told her to stay behind. I told her to take the young ones and leave if things got bad. And yet... she came. She brought her daughters.
"Master..."
'GRAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!'
I roared—not in pain, but to drive them back. To make them run. But they didn't. I saw her thin body shake. I saw the kids cry and pee themselves. All three of them were frozen in fear, holding each other. Somewhere in the distance, a bell chimed—soft and cold, like a reminder. Now, there's no escape. I couldn't let them leave. No, no, wait, please, me, don't do that...
'Run! Go!! Do you all want to die here with me!?'
I shouted, trying to hold back the monster inside. I could barely stay in control. My mind was slipping fast. The smell of blood... it made me lose control. It made me hungry.
So...
'Get back!! Don't come any closer!!!'
"Master!? What are you...!!?"
I yelled one last warning, knowing what I had to do. Before I lost my mind fully, I acted. I opened my mouth wide, held my spear tight—and stabbed it into my own head, right into the skull. I twisted it to make sure I died. And at the same time, my sight spun. My world faded like a light turning off.
I think I saw them running toward me, but I'm not sure.
Let's try again. A better ending. As long as I can hold onto my sanity...
* * *
"...Was that a dream?"
I woke up covered in sweat. Not the kind from heat—but from fear. A kind of gross, sticky sweat that made me felt sick.
Was it one of those daydreams? My head was full of fake memories. It came out of nowhere. It was too sharp, too dark, and too much. Now that I was awake, it made no sense why I imagined such a thing. It just felt... wrong.
(Yeah. It's because I've been feeling so gross lately.)
Lying in the warmth, I told myself that. It had to be the reason.
...That's right. The more I think, the worse it feels. Something isn't right. It's like a big wall broke inside me, and now all my thoughts are rushing out.
This mansion—it's too big. I didn't notice before, but I always end up in the same place again and again. And where does all this stuff come from? The food, the clothes—I've never seen how it gets here. I just open my mouth and take what they give.
I don't know anything. I don't even know who I really am. I woke up one day and everyone called me "Master." I just went along with it and I don't know what's outside. I don't remember anything from before.
More than that—I don't understand these feelings inside me.
"Master, are you alright?"
The soft voice brought me back. It felt like I had woken up again.
(A dream inside a dream? Maybe even a third?)
The thought came and went. I felt a little bad for making up excuses like that.
So I turned my head toward the voice. And then... I saw skin.
"Master?"
One of the maids, Tatsu, smiled through the rising steam. She came from a family of wandering shrine maidens. Now, she was wearing only a thin cloth. She looked at me kindly.
"Hmm... haah... Master, is it?"
"Um... what happened just now?"
More maids came in. They were also wearing almost nothing. They smiled and tilted their heads, all looking at me. Their skin was shiny from soap, and their cheeks were pink. They came close like puppies.
"How are you feeling?"
"Why the scary look?"
"I see."
I gently touched her head a few times. A light pat, just to change the mood. She smiled like a shy girl being praised. But if I pulled my hand away now, the other girls would grab it and fight over it.
(...)
Nothing had changed. Since I woke up here, every day had been the same. The maids helped me clean my body like a king in a bath. It seemed normal, but lately, I was starting to notice how weird it really was.
Ran pressed her chest on my back, her voice soft and playful. Madoka hugged my right arm, her eyes begging. Shino clung to my left arm, biting her finger and then licking mine to clean them. Nagi, smiling like she was in love, kissed my feet and washed them with care. Mio, in front, rubbed herself like a sponge, twisting her hips. Other girls crawled below me, scrubbing the floor while sighing with joy. And the rest watched, waiting their turn.
It all felt wrong.
Splash, splash. Squish, squish. Slap, slap. The loud sounds of water echoed in the big room. Blushing, smiling, dizzy with happiness, they kept using their bodies to clean mine, making me unable to speak.
(Why...?)
Honestly, everything I saw was just skin. Everyone was naked. And in a bath, that made sense. But I was starting to see that this wasn't normal. Changing girls every time with no feelings, and just a habit. But something had shifted inside me. A deep, heavy feeling that wouldn't go away.
(Yeah. What is this?)
I think it was always there, hiding. It showed up a little during my fun time with Kuzu. But once I saw it, it wouldn't stop growing. Now, I can't handle it anymore.
"..."
I looked again at the girls around me. Their bodies were not like mine. Pale, soft skin. No cuts or scars. Long hair. Thin arms and legs. And they had chests. They didn't have what I had down below, and I'd accepted that without a second thought before—but now, I couldn't stop staring.
"...?"
"Master?"
"Oh wow."
"Hehe...!"
"!!!!!"
They noticed me. But instead of being shy, they smiled. Some opened their arms. Some showed off. Some gently pushed closer. And I didn't stop them. I watched, and I touched. They welcomed it—again.
"...!!!"
I clenched my teeth and shook. I fought it. Then I sighed and whispered.
"What?"
"Get in the bath. Wash up."
I said it rough and flat. Just like always.
That was how I held myself back. I ruined the mood on purpose. Or I left in silence. I don't even know how many times now. I wonder what they really think. I was too scared to ask.
"...Understood."
Though they looked sad, they followed my order. They poured hot water over their heads from a wooden bucket. The steam turned our skin white. The water ran over the marble floor, carrying away all the dirt and color. Even their long, dark hair washed away with it.
Sticky soap. Tangled hair. Big bubbles. All of it slid into the drain.
"..."
I stood up, and moved past the girls, brushing them off like bugs.
"Huh..."
Then I sank into the hot water alone, letting the heat wrap around me. I settled in deep and looked around, releasing another long sigh.
This bath could fit fifty people easy. Lanterns lit up the room. Warm light danced on the water. Paintings filled the walls. Statues poured water like waterfalls. It was said the water came from deep underground, full of power. A beautiful, perfect bath.
"...!"
A splash broke the quiet. Then a soft touch—arms wrapped around me from behind. It was Nagisa, grinning with that same playful spark in her eyes.
The other girls slipped into the water, surrounding me from all sides just like before.
They weren't finished with me yet.
It used to feel normal. Now it felt like too much. But it hadn't changed. Just me.
"Master, how about some sake? Or... maybe an egg?"
A gentle offer. And then they touched me again. Their soft skin brushed mine. I tried to push them away, but my hand sank into their softness like jelly.
"...What are you doing?"
"I thought I'd help your hand feel better. Was it too much? Hmm♪"
Nagi spoke slowly, like she was dreaming. She kept holding my arm, pulling it closer. Her skin overflowed under my touch, warm and full.
Character Notes:
• Tatsu - A maid from a family of wandering shrine maidens. She serves Master in the bathhouse, dressed only in a thin cloth. Her sweet and caring demeanor contrasts with Master's growing unease.
• Madoka - A maid in the estate who assists the protagonist after he wakes up, and brings the protagonist tea and books. She is described as polite and has a bell-like sound associated with her
• Shino - A maid who twists around Master's left arm, biting and licking his fingers in affection. Her devoted service feels maddeningly abnormal to Master.
• Nagi - Southern maid who wears minimal clothing like underwear or swimsuits. Her attire reflects the norms of her homeland.
• Ran - Seductive southern-born maid with wheat-colored skin and a beauty mark near her lips. Confident, teasing, and warm—mixes mature affection with sultry playfulness.
• Mio - Timid maid who often apologizes for the twins' behavior. Also known for preparing intricate shaved ice desserts.
• Kuzu - A young girl from a former noble family who was sold into servitude. Tomobe, encounters her and other girls who have wandered into a dangerous underground area on the former Yakushiji family estate (Kayo's bought them later) in Chapter 150. In the loop, she is a head maid beside Amatsuru. Sharp-eyed, disciplined maid with a strong presence.
• Nagisa - A youthful maid who brings water and helps wash the Master on Chapter 200.
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