Volume 1 Chapter 14 Mean Villainess, Worried By Everyone
Good morning, Elena. Oh, you look quite pale.
I was thinking about the cause of my past life's death when my mother called out to me.
I already knew about my pale complexion, as I had just looked in the mirror and noticed how terrible I looked.
"Yes, I had a bit of a nightmare."
"A nightmare? What kind of dream was it?"
"It was a dream about my own death."
I couldn't possibly tell her the truth, so I answered by extracting the most shocking part of my past life's end.
"Oh dear, was there blood?"
"Huh? Well... to the point where most of the blood in my body was gone."
I added in my mind, since it was a death by blood loss. For some reason, my mother clapped her hands with a pleasant smile.
"A dream about your own death signifies a rebirth into a new self, and it's a good dream when there's blood."
"Dream interpretation?"
"Yes!"
For a moment, I thought she was happy about my death.
But a rebirth into a new self...
Is it a different kind of rebirth from reincarnation?
Like shedding a layer of skin?
Now that I think about it, my mother seems like a reincarnator too, but I wonder if she remembers the cause of her past life's death.
I can't ask her because I don't want her to find out that I'm a reincarnator.
"Changing the subject, Elena, have you had the chance to meet anyone from the grade above yours?"
"The grade above? Not much so far..."
"So... do you know Sir Lorentz from the Marquis Blanche family?"
"Sir Lorentz? I can say we know each other to some extent, but I'm not sure if I would call us acquaintances."
When I gave such a vague answer, my mother tilted her head with a puzzled expression.
"I heard a little rumor at the tea party the other day... but since it's just a rumor for now, I'll let you know once I find out the truth."
"Yes. Oh, it's already this time. Well then, Mother, I'm off."
I thought that the rumor Ms. Natalia mentioned about my name being listed as a candidate for Sir Lorentz's bride might be it, as I headed towards the carriage with Rolus.
'I guess there's a possibility of the Lorentz route. If it's the Lorentz route, the villainess dies, but... hmm... I suppose that's just how it is.'
I received my mother's mutterings in Japanese on my back.
I couldn't help but exclaim, 'Seriously?'
Because right now, it seems like she's trying to brush off the daughter's death as something unavoidable.
I mean, do characters in otome games actually die?
The gal games I played had no one dying.
I wish someone could tell me whether otome games are unsettling or gal games are peaceful.
And while we're at it, I also want to know whether my previous life ended in an accident or was it homicide.
"Haaah..."
I got into the carriage, and as I sat down, I cradled my head and let out a deep sigh.
Though I was slightly distracted by my mother's talk, the memories of my previous life that I saw in my dreams still lingered in my mind.
During the funeral, the words of the game maniac kept piercing my heart, "Next time, I'll make sure to see you home safely."
He must have thought my death was his fault.
If that wasn't a misunderstanding, I really feel sorry for him.
It was just my carelessness, and it wasn't anyone's fault.
I wonder if he was okay after that...
I would feel relieved if he was acting like himself, being upset about missing the login bonus for the social game because he attended my funeral, but he was crying so hard without caring about the people around him.
I'm worried.
I hope he's not dragging my death around.
"...Hey, Rolus, would you cry if I died?"
"Huh...?"
"No, I mean, would Rolus be freed from being a Servant if I died?"
Given the huge difference in their positions, asking him this might have been meaningless.
"It's nothing. Forget what I just said."
If I had to say who was in a similar position to him, it would probably be Leve, who has been playing games with me all this time.
I might ask him a little later.
If I died, what would he do after that?
"Lady."
As I was lost in my thoughts, looking down, Rolus spoke to me.
"What?"
"Lady won't die."
"I don't know about that. I might suddenly get run over by a carriage and die tomorrow."
I never thought I would die so suddenly in my past life... wait, what?
I thought... no, if I did think that, it would mean I sensed my time of death.
But the cause of death was an accident, and I wasn't suffering from a terminal illness that would warrant a prognosis.
Maybe there are still things I can't remember.
Am I unable to remember, or did I dream and recall my past life more vividly than before, but it feels like there are so many gaps?
In any case, the me from my past life definitely liked that gaming fanatic.
But even when he asked me out, I didn't date him.
At that time, I thought it was the best choice.
But now, I don't understand why that was the best choice.
So I'm sure there are gaps in my memory here too.
"Lady"
As I'm covering my face with both hands, trying to remember, leaning forward, Rolus calls me again.
His voice seems a bit louder than usual.
"It's okay, don't worry about it... wait, why are you gripping that handkerchief so tightly, Rolus? I'm not crying or anything, okay?"
"...But this morning"
"That was that, and this is this. Forget about it."
There's no way I would cry just remembering my cause of death.
After all, I'm reincarnated like this, so it's only natural that my past self is dead.
But if I remember the look on his face at my funeral, I'm probably going to cry.
"Lady, are you really okay?"
"I've said it many times, but I'm fine. See you at lunch again."
As I got off the carriage, I waved lightly to Rolus, who was still clutching the handkerchief tightly, and hurried to the classroom.
Thinking back, this was the first time Rolus had ever worried about me, I realized as I took my seat.
I've seen Rolus look at me with bewilderment countless times after witnessing my weird behavior, but I never thought he would worry about me.
"Elena?"
"Hmm, oh, Leve, good morning."
"Yeah, good morning. Are you okay?"
Leve, who had just entered the classroom, came straight to me without even putting down her bag and peered into my face.
"I'm fine, but what's wrong?"
"You don't look so good, and Rolus asked me to look after you, saying he saw you clutching a handkerchief earlier."
That Rolus.
Just as I was considering whether to explain the morning's events, she asked if I was feeling unwell, so I simply denied it.
I was thinking of asking Leve what she would do if I died, but I thought it might be better to stop this conversation before Rolus gets even more worried.
After all, whatever I tell Leve will most likely reach Rolus' ears anyway.
"I've never seen Rolus so flustered before."
"Yeah, me neither."
Leve and I shared a quiet laugh.
* * *
During the Divination Magic class that day...
"Lady Elena!"
Ms. Natalia approached.
I stopped practicing my magic control and looked up.
"I can do a little bit of flower divination now!"
Saying that, she showed me the seeds she had been holding tightly.
It seems she noticed my mood and the slightly worried expression of Leve, as if sensing that I was feeling down.
And it looks like she's trying to cheer me up.
How adorable.
Leve, who was nearby, said, "Elena, why don't you let her read your fortune?" so I nodded without hesitation.
"Well then, I will read Lady Elena's past, present, and future."
Ms. Natalia took a deep breath and infused the beautiful seeds with magic.
Then, the seeds lined up in the order of past, present, and future shone beautifully...
"Wow!"
With a puff, they all exploded.
"The seeds exploded...!"
Leve's voice seemed to echo unusually.
Glancing around, Ms. Natalia looked stunned, and the divination magic teacher who had been watching from a distance had eyes wide open.
Teacher, this situation is unexpected...!
"N-no, um, it seems I messed up, Lady Elena!"
"I-it's okay, Ms. Natalia, um, you know, it's fine!"
I do think it's a bit much for the past, present, and future to all explode!?
But it's okay because it's divination.
Totally fine...
If I consider my previous life as the past, then that's how I died and an explosion was unavoidable, but as for the present and future, I might end up heading towards the Lorentz route my mother mentioned this morning, and ultimately have a short life in this world too...?
While I was thinking about such things, Ms. Natalia was being called by the teacher.
"Eh, Elena, are you okay?"
"I'm fine."
I'm just a bit battered and bruised, but I'm totally fine.
Yeah, I'm okay.
Though saying I'm okay feels like I'm about to experience gestalt collapse, I really am okay.
"Right, I suppose that explosion was probably due to her magic control not working properly. Just like my jewels shining brightly."
That must be it.
I'll just convince myself that's the case.
And I do feel a bit sorry for Ms. Natalia too.
"Ah, oh, that makes some sense!"
Leve is also nodding vigorously in agreement.
"Alright, I have to get better at magic control!"
"Yeah, I'll support you. Speaking of which, to help you feel better, how about we play your favorite board game after school today?"
"Really? Let's play!"
While I felt a bit sorry for making everyone worry like this, I also felt a little happy.
But I don't want to trouble them too much, so I'll try not to overthink it.
After all, I can't change my previous life no matter how much I think about it.
As for the future... I hope I can somehow manage to change it for the better.
"...I wonder if I won't live long. If so, the next time I die, I want to die without making anyone sad."
"...Elena?"
"Ah! That's right, Leve, please don't tell Rolus about the explosion with the seeds. If you do, he might start fidgeting again while clutching his handkerchief."
"Y-Yes, I understand!"
We made a solid promise.
* * *
Even though we made that promise, on that day, Rolus never let go of the handkerchief, not even for a moment.
I wonder just how much my tears worried him.
That's something only Rolus would know.
"You know, Rolus, I won't cry anymore, so you can put that handkerchief away, alright?"
"...No, somehow, just like this, it makes me feel calm."
So you weren't worried at all, you Servant!!
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