Lili's POV
I have a boy I love.
He lives nearby, and his name is Rudy. He's a beautiful boy (Shota-like).
He's really very beautiful and pretty, you know?
His skin is whiter than mine... and his eyes are so clear.
To be honest, I think Rudy and I have a lot in common.
Because I think if Rudy was born in a bigger village with more girls, he would be very popular.
That's why I always stay close to Rudy because other girls will take him away if I don't.
Even in this small village, there are some rivals, though I have the biggest advantage because of our age difference.
But Rudy has not been well lately.
After all these years of getting to know each other, becoming practically girlfriends... he always seems lonely.
I can't help but feel that he's there for me, but he's not.
Rudy is always nice to me, but for some reason, he seems lonely.
When I turned 12, I forced him to promise to marry me.
And for some reason, Rudy refused, but eventually, we got engaged.
I was relieved to know that Rudy was now mine.
We had a good time after that.
But for some reason, Rudy often looked more lonely than before.
He looks lonely even though I'm with him.
But I guess that's the weakness of being in love with him... I can't help but admire his fragile profile.
Time has passed, and both of us have turned 14.
Tomorrow is our coming of age ceremony, which means we become adults.
What I mean is the day my engagement to Rudy will turn into a marriage.
I can't wait, and I can't help it.
Because after tomorrow we can get married whenever we want.
I'm sure Rudy's too shy to confess.
So I'm going to propose!
I'm going to propose when Rudy gets his job, and I get mine... and I've already decided.
I wonder what job I'll get... The one I want most is a 'seamstress'. Because Rudy often tears his clothes.
And then the day of destiny arrived.
Rudy's job was to be a hunter.
"Congratulations, Rudy! You got the job that you want."
I knew Rudy wanted a hunter's job, so why did he look so sad?
"Yes, thank you..."
Why is he crying?
"Why are you not in good spirits, Rudy...? Oh, maybe you've always wanted to be a knight or an adventurer?"
"Well, I don't really care what job I get as long as I can be with Lili."
What should I do? I'm blushing... it's not like me... it's not fair not to be surprised.
"I see. I'm a little embarrassed... Thank you!"
Finally, it's my turn.
Just like with Rudy, I got in line with five others from the neighborhood.
I got a piece of paper from the priest and prayed with the priest's staff.
And somehow, an angel came down... straight towards me.
I know... this happens when someone is a Saint or a Hero (Yuusha).
No... Don't come... I can't be around Rudy.
Still, the angel puts her hand in front of me and hugs me.
Then, after a moment, she left.
I was stunned.
Why, why me...
* * *
"This is great! A wonderful job! Lili, no, Lili-sama's job is a saint!"
"What? A saint?"
I was surrounded by priests and others in confusion.
Being a saint means I should be proud of it... I tried to smile, suppressing the urge to cry.
I went home and cried as hard as I could.
As I cried, I told my parents to have Rudy break off the engagement.
They know there is nothing I can do...
(Why are you a saint?)
I heard my father say.
(Dear...)
My parents accepted me with a sad face.
And for a week, I watched Rudy from afar, longingly.
I didn't dare to speak to him directly.
Then Cain the Hero (Yuusha) came for me.
I would have to spend the rest of my life with this man... I would have to leave my life as a woman and my feelings for Rudy behind...
But I was wrong.
This man, Cain the Hero (Yuusha), was in love with someone else.
"But I'm Hero (Yuusha), so I have to give up on her. However, if I defeat the Demon King quickly... if she is alone, I will propose to her!"
And I told him about Rudy.
He always listened without saying a word.
Then I asked Cain for a favor.
I kissed him in front of Rudy.
Rudy ran away with a tearful look on his face.
"Is this what you wanted?"
"Yes, because I want Rudy to be happy... Otherwise, he will be a stubborn single man for the rest of his life."
"But doesn't this make you sad?"
"He's very popular! If I'm not there... I'm sure he'll be happy with another girl."
"Well, it's hard for both of us."
He and I are the same... or so I thought.
As Rudy got closer to the breakup, he suddenly changed.
He didn't want to leave me at any cost. That's how he felt.
I'm so happy to see it... and I wish I could give him a hug... but I can't.
How can I not be happy that Rudy wants me so much?
But I'm a saint now, and the world will end if Cain and I don't fight.
We don't have a choice.
"Lili, I'll do anything... Please, don't go."
Thank you, that means a lot... but I just can't do it. I have to make excuses and keep my feelings in check.
"Hey, Rudy, what are you talking about? The world is in trouble if the Hero and I don't fight!"
I want to be with Rudy too... and I want to stay with him.
"Why don't you leave the fighting to the other Heroes (Yuusha) and the Knights? So, please live here, please, I beg you!"
If I could, I would too...
"There's no other hero, and I love Cain... I love Cain the Hero... not you."
In fact, I love him... But I want him to be happy... So forget about me.
"I don't care if you don't love me... but don't go."
(How can he care so much...? There's no point in me being here if he thinks I don't love him...)
"Oh, Rudy, I'm so disappointed in you. I don't even know why I love you anymore. Just get out of my sight."
Saying the opposite of what I feel is hard... so please quit...
"No, I'll do anything. So, please don't go."
I'm happy, but I can't answer that. However, I'll never forget him... So, goodbye...
Then Cain came along.
He did a bad thing, and he took the hate.
He cursed Rudy and beat him up.
This is good... this is fine...
"You're just a hunter... that's what you are! Don't talk to her anymore! She doesn't even want to look at you! You're just a scumbag, and I don't like your looks too."
Now he must really hate me. But he'll be happy and forget me.
"Lili... don't go..."
I'm sorry... I made you worry.
I talked it over with Cain, and we decided to leave immediately.
"Are you sure you're okay with that?"
"I can't help it... if I see Rudy's face, I won't be able to stop crying."
"Well... he's going to cry, too."
"Yes, he is."
"Then, as a man, I can tell you... he's crazy about you, and he'll probably wait for you till the day he dies."
"Really?"
"Then let's kill the Demon King and get back to the one we love."
"Yeah."
I wanted to be strong as soon as possible.
So, I pushed myself too hard.
I've already become so strong that I can defeat even demons.
But then, a rescue request arrived via the knighthood.
To tell the truth, I wanted to kill the noble of this castle.
Because the lord thought we would not come if we heard who it was, so he hid who had attacked him.
And the one who destroyed the town and attacked him was "Mammon the Strong-armed". He was in the castle.
But that we have met him, we have no choice but to fight... Maybe another job might be saved... But there is no way this demon would let a Hero (Yuusha) and a saint escape.
However, we were just an inexperienced Hero (Yuusha) and an inexperienced saint... So, we were outmatched.
Cain's holy sword was easily broken, and swordsmanship and magic were no match for him.
My staff was easily shattered, and I was hit so hard that my healing magic could not keep up with the attacks.
And then, Cain died when Mammon crushed his arm and head.
Now it is my turn...
"Woman, huh? I don't like messing with women."
I was stripped naked.
"You are a saint, but you exposed your skin to the public... So, you've lost... Run away wherever you want."
No way… I gave up the man I love, and Hero (Yuusha) died with me. Even if I run away and survive here, this town is over, no one will help me, and I will be raped to death by Demons. Or if I survive, I will be raped to death by thieves... Even if I escape there... I wonder what life will be like for the saint... It's over.
"Mammon, I want to fight you."
"Then die..."
Mammon thinks people are nothing but insects... So, he kills them brutally but does not humiliate them.
And in the past, there was a Princess who begged for her life, but she was killed because "he didn't want to hug an insect."
But now, I can keep my dignity as a woman.
I'm burned like a bug and stripped limb from limb... Now, my life is over... But I miss Rudy.
* * *
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